I wrote a few days ago that the real challenges are inside us; the journey simply exposes them.
Here’s my challenge: guilt.
And I don’t even know, for certain, why.
I feel like I’m cheating the system. Living without the cost of a house and its utilities is less expensive. I know a lot of people who’d travel if only their significant other wanted to, or the kids were older or not born yet or whatever; if only they had a job that blah blah blah.
Everyone I talk to says, how nice for you. Some of them seem to mean, that’s great; how can I make it better? But I feel, sometimes, like there’s a subtext of, sure, you get to go driving all over creation, dragging your wife and little girl along, while the rest of us have to have a real job and be mature and keep civilisation from collapsing.
Yeah, maybe that’s it; that’s where the guilt comes from, in part. What nonsense.
It is not wrong to live an unconventional lifestyle. I’ve lived conventional. For years, I had work (which I loved) which was in an office. I had other responsibilities in life which made a location-specific life make the most sense.
Now, that’s changed. We’ve built businesses which are location independent. Certain spiritual responsibilities are no longer mine, at least for the time being. Fiona’s school allows her to go where and when we go. My friendships are worldwide, many of them virtual (which I’d like to change, which is another reason to travel.)
The only value in guilt is when we’ve done something wrong and need to correct our path.
Nothing doing. There’s no reason for guilt here. I am making good choices with my family’s best interests at heart.
Still, it lingers, that angry voice in the back of my head, whining about responsibility, what I owe.
Ah well. I’ll keep listening to the voices that make sense.